Well I flew to Helsinki after all and it was a rather turbulent trip after
all. If I counted right it was my 19th trip which will be nice as the batbday
party will be my trip no. 20 then so that I can celebrate a double party then.
Well though I originally was scheduled to stay with Enochian I ended up at
Mizos place for 3 nights out of reasons which are hidden behind walls of beer
and Whiskey sour. Well the trip ended at Shumrenas, Catherinas and Illusias
housewarming party including a nice relaxing sauna and the feeling that I
really belong to Finland not to Germany. Well anyway.. I am back home and am
working a bit.. darned can't believe it's already march again. Have been
feeling as if one of my darker stages might begin again soon. I have this
Kaamos inside me I can't fully pinpoint. Friends and Lovers can give me some
warmth from the outside but sooner or later Kaamos freezes it all. Have been
having this weird feelings when I leave my room go to the outside, smell the
fresh air and all the options in it. How life could have been if, what are all
the people doing out there who breathe the same air like me. Been building
this castle around me the last few days barely leaving my room mainly playing
KOTOR II, Friends around me are about to finish their studies, my best friend
soon will have his Dr. title... One shouldn't compare lifes but yet doing so
is what makes us human maybe....