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Library: Bard tale: The poor camel man

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Author: harza
Date:Feb 15 2004

Some time ago, I was spending time in the Rusty Shield bar and after a couple
of pints I noticed an interesting looking man sitting at the corner table. He
looked like a soldier so I decided to have a little chat with him hoping to
to hear some stories about battles and heroic deeds.

He wasn't a talkative guy but after a couple of hours (and dozen of beers) he
started his story: "I am a soldier" he said. "But I ran away". When I asked
the reason he continued, "This is quite embarrassing so you must promise
you'll never tell this story to anyone". I nodded my head and made my promise
not to tell his story to anyone (yeah sure).

"Ok, here's my story" he said. Our camp was located near to the great central
desert and out mission was to protect a small village from the attack of
strange thieves. Two months, can you imagine, TWO MONTHS went by without any
conflict. It was a really frustrating time. But the bad food and the lack of
action wasn't the worst thing. The worst thing was the lack of women (you know
what I mean).

One day I went to talk to the sergeant and asked how do they satisfy, uh, 'the
manly needs' in desert. "Well" said sergeant, "You should try out the camels".
That sounded quite kinky so I had to ask was he really sure about it? "But of
course. Almost every soldier does it", answered the sergeant. I was shocked at
first but then I decided to do it with camels. After all sergeant had said
that would be ok.

Few days passed and I went to see sergeant again. "The camels were quite good,
but I think I'll need a real woman". The sergeant stared at me for a while
then he blushed bright red and finally burts into hideous laughter. "NO NO NO!
YOU DIDN'T. . . OR DID YOU? DID YOU F***K THE CAMEL? YOU SICK BASTARD" said
the sergeant drying his tears. "But, sir, you said that I should try out the
camels". "Yes I did but when i told you to try out CAMEL'S i meant the local
brothel which is located in the village".

The sergeant continued his laughter and banged the desk with his fists. I was
ashamed and I felt my self so stupid. I knew that the word would spread among
my fellow soldiers so I packed my gear and I ran away. "That was an
interesting story" I said but the man just mumbled something and passed out.


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