Library: Snapshot of Eastbrooke

Some days around the town of Eastbrooke were a little more memorable than others. Some battles are over tangible items and others are over matters of the heart. This day had it all. I say Eastbrooke is a town, but you won't find it on any normal map. It takes a little more effort to get into that community. But once you pay the toll to enter you are guaranteed a home there for one calendar year. Eastbrooke has many things to offer those who are willing to part with some cash and Roark, Exorcist, and Duckman thought they were ready to experience all of it. Roark had recently been given a new leadership role for a local merchant who ran a small shop called 'Half Hour Photo'. He worked hard for the merchant, piling up the corpses of irritated and irrational patrons who had the nerve to bother him. Roark also dabbled in magic and was able to produce amazing images of people, places, and things from the past. He was feared by unruly customers and esteemed by those who wanted to hold on to their memories in dazzling, true-to-life color. No amount of fame comes without its cost. Roark had to pay for his with many long hours of service. Well, even the best warrior needs a break from time to time, so Roark decided to try his luck with the ladies. He was a man of many hidden talents and skills. Unknown to most people, Roark was an excellent cook and he planned to use this to his advantage. He went out to the best local vendors and purchased everything he needed for a perfect romantic dinner with a lovely maiden. Apparently, the evening went according to plan and Roark left after a fantastic meal for a night on the town with the maiden. Of course, nothing good can happen without some repercussions. Exorcist, Roark, and Duckman had worked out an agreement where they each split a portion of the rent in the town of Eastbrooke. They lived on the top floor of a building that overlooked the pond. This pond was special in the summer because everyone would gather from all around Eastbrooke to swim and socialize. This, of course, pleased the three warriors. Exorcist and Duckman returned home that evening to an unusual aroma that could almost be felt when they entered the room. It was strong and powerful and they knew if they were to survive they would need to work together to defeat it. They quickly developed a plan that allowed them to search the cooking area and locate the offensive odor. The search led to a peculiar little magical box that Roark called a 'microwave'. The whole idea behind this box confused Exorcist and Duckman, but they knew it could make their food warm without fire. They liked the microwave most of the time, but today was different because it was the source of their new foe. Locating the problem was easier than they expected and identifying it also proved an easy task. Even though they weren't smart at most things, they were able to able to spot different kinds of food very easily. This was fried squid that was often called calamari. They had seen it before but it never smelled like this. I must interrupt the story for a minute to add some personal comments. At this point, everything is still ok. Exorcist and Duckman are in no immediate danger from the calamari. They were afraid for a moment that some sea creature had wandered into their small dwelling, but luckily it had not. Roark is off having a great time with a maiden, taking a break from the daily hassles he faces. Everything is ok now. If Duckman and Exorcist had acted different at this point, I probably wouldn't be telling this story. This day would have been ordinary. But like I said earlier, this day was memorable. Ok, back to the story . . . Exorcist and Duckman felt they had to do something about this blatant lack of respect for their dwelling. Roark had obviously wanted to somehow undermine them by leaving this smelling squid in the open. They decided some punishment was in order, but Roark was a reputed warrior who was physically larger than they were. How could they get back at him? Suddenly, an idea developed between them. I don't know who came up with this devious plot, but if I could remember I would never tell. They decided they could take the calamari with the pot it was cooked in (which still contained the warm cooking oil) and place it on Roark's bed. Brilliant! Brilliant? Turns out it was not such a good idea. Roark returned to their dwelling that evening and discovered a very impressive odor coming from his room. He, of course, feared a seamonster had wandered into his room and died. He drew his weapons and rushed in, only to discover cold oil and crusty squid on his bed. To say he was not pleased would be an understatement. The battle that followed was fierce, but thankfully, nobody was killed. Many lessons were learned that day, but the best experience comes from the hardest fought battles. Roark, Exorcist, and Duckman soon parted ways. But the tales from Eastbrooke, Langston Swamp, and Carriage House are still told to this day. Perhaps, when you're older, we can discuss Big Rust clinging to our toilet for dear life, how to properly 'set the mood', how drool fell from the air conditioning vents, and how evil females can actually be. Perhaps, when you're older . . .

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Library: Snapshot of Eastbrooke