What a nice few days...

Been drunk three days in a row so I guess it wasn't too bad that I had a break
of it today though I sadly enough have to admit that it helped... if only for
an evening. Biggest mistake was that I was drinking alone one two of the three
instances and that I ended doing some pretty weird shit like calling shitloads
of my friends in finland in the middle of the night and even called my old
friend Balance in the US. Oh well. Co worker asked me whether I can take over
an early shift on Friday and I am inclined to say yes. Though lots of days off
sound like a great plan as well. Been having some 'nice' mood swings again
within those days... I sometimes just fear I'm turning crazy and that's not a
great thought. Unluckily this is keeping me from doing the coding I planned to
do in these former few days. Well we will see what happens. Just am watching
One Hour Photo which is a depressing movie in itself... prolly was a shitty
idea to see it while I am in one of my selfreconsideration stages. (Damned I
hope that actually IS a word) Well anyway it's not that it helped me to become
better :P. Nor has been watching Lost in Translation which I saw earlier
today. Maybe I should get drunk again or maybe I should just try to get on
with my life and be a happy happy joy joy robot like society asks us all to.
It's so funny that apparently I am perfect in seeing only the bad things in my
life.. I tend to totally ignore the good things and on days like that it is as
if they have totally vanished or even never existed. Its just as if my life is
a fucking tetris game.. whenever I have hopes that I eliminated one row there
is another damned column falling from out of nowhere and obstructing the weak
plan I might have made for the existance some people call my life. Oh and yeah
I did continue writing blog though aparently no one gives a fucking shit about
the mental diarrhea I produce.