Here is the Bard play me and Str did today at Skeep's Amphitheatre
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%Inferno says 'Hello everybody, I'm going to play and sing a little song for
you.'
%Inferno bows to the crowd
%Str enters the stage.
%Inferno sings 'Row, row, row your boat, gently down the stream...'
%Str says 'What! What?'
%Inferno sings 'Row, row, row your boat, gently down the stream...'
%Str says 'What are YOU doing, it's time for MY show!'
%Inferno shouts 'what are you doing here? You are ruining my show!'
%Inferno says 'Nope, I am just about to start my play, now shoo!'
%Str says 'shoo yourself, I'm not going anywhere'
%Str takes one mithril coin and throws it on the stage
%Str says 'There, take that and leave!'
%Inferno waves his hand and smirks arrogantly.
%Inferno says 'I don't want your petty coins.'
%Str shrugs his shoulders.
%Str says 'Whatever, I'm doing my play now!'
%Str gently takes his piccolo from his pocket and starts playing it.
%Inferno yells 'Oh no you don't!'
%Inferno wields his sword and with a swift thrust he hits Str's instrument,
breaking it in two.
%Str stares at the pieces with terror in his eyes.
%Str screams 'Aaaaaaaargh! You brainless imbecile!'.
%Str grabs Inferno's guitar that's lying on the floor and hits the stage with
it. The guitar shatters into pieces.
%Inferno attacks Str with his sword.
%Str shouts 'HELP! This maniac is trying to kill me!'.
%Str yells 'Unfair! I have no combat training or experience, I'm just a lonely
bard!'.
%Inferno fails his attack, because someone threw a tomato at him from the
audience.
%Inferno wipes the tomato from his face.
%Inferno turns to Str and grins evilly, ready to hit the killing blow.
%Str suddently notices his mithril coin and ducks to pick it up at the same
moment when Inferno slashes.
%Inferno swings his sword in the air missing Str's head by just a few
millimeters.
%Inferno is so surprised that he loses his grip on the sword, making it fly
across the stage.
%Str puts the coin in his purse and notices what has happened.
%Inferno starts to move closer to the sword but Str is already ahead of him.
%Str takes the sword and wields it
%Str starts swining it furiously left and right, luckily you are safe distance
away from him.
%Str misses Inf.
%Str misses Inf.
%Str misses Inf.
%Inferno takes huge battleaxe from his inventory and wields it in both hands.
%Str looks at the battleaxe astonished.
%Str says 'Whow! Where did THAT come from?'
%Inferno says 'from my inventory!'
%Str says 'where?'
%Inferno says 'inventory, umm.. youknow, pockets.'
%Str says 'your pockets must be h-u-g-e on the inside!'
%Inferno grins again evilly and attacks Str.
%Str jumps backwards.
%Inferno incisively tears Str's cloths, causing a nasty ripping sound.
%Str eeps as his trousers drop to his ankles.
%Inferno laughs and points at Str's undies that have lovely pictures of small
white kittens.
%Str shouts 'Argh! Now you destroyed my pants also!'.
%Str cries 'first my lovely piccolo, now my silk pants..'.
%Str shouts 'I'll kill you!'.
%Str tries to hit Inferno.
%Str tries but misses again.
%Str kicks the trousers off his legs.
%Str tightens his grip on the sword, this time concentrating for better slash.
%Inferno successfully dodges Str's futile slash.
%Inferno laughs.
%Str misses Inferno.
%Str misses Inferno.
%Str tries to hit again but misses again.
%Str swings the sword more and more, each time missing.
%Str is all exhausted and out of breath.
%Inferno laughs more.
%Str lifts a finger in the air as if to say 'Just a second'.
%Inferno tilts his head and wonders what Str is doing.
%Str takes a notebook from a small bag.
%Str reads the notebook.
%Str reads the notebook again.
%Str memorizes the tunes for Noituloves dischord.
%Str puts the notebook back in the small bag.
%Inferno taps his foot impatiently.
%Str starts chanting.
%Str sings 'dIsCHoRD!'
%Str watches with selfpride as his noituloves dischord hits Inferno.
%Inferno falls down laughing.
%Inferno says 'is that all you got?'
%Str ponders for a second.
%Str starts chanting.
%Inferno leans on his battleaxe, smiling and waiting.
%Str chantes some more...
%Str utters the magic words 'havia kauhistus pois!'
%Inferno eeps.
%Inferno disappears into thick air.
%Str smiles happily.
%Str walks to his trousers and picks them up.
%Str shrugs his shoulders.
%Str turns to the audience.
%Str says 'oh well, that's all tonight! Thanks for coming!'
%Str bows.