body except for her eyes and fingers.
The burqa, on the other hand, is an evil tool of
patriarchal oppression that covers all of a woman's
body except for her eyes and fingers.
Q: It sounds like the same thing with a different
name.

A: Now, don't go comparing Afghanistan and Saudi
Arabia. The Saudis are our friends.


Q: But I thought you said 15 of the 19 hijackers on
September 11th were from Saudi Arabia.

A: Yes, but they trained in Afghanistan.


Q: Who trained them?

A: A very bad man named Osama bin Laden.
Q: Was he from Afghanistan?

A: Uh, no, he was from Saudi Arabia too. But he was a
bad man, a very bad man.
Q: I seem to recall he was our friend once.

A: Only when we helped him and the mujahadeen repel
the Soviet invasion of Afghanistan back in the 1980s.
Q: Who are the Soviets? Was that the Evil Communist
Empire Ronald Reagan talked about?

A: There are no more Soviets. The Soviet Union broke
up in 1990 or thereabouts, and now they have elections
and capitalism like us. We call them Russians now.
Q: So the Soviets - I mean, the Russians - are now our
friends?

A: Well, not really. You see, they were our friends
for many years after they stopped being Soviets, but
then they decided not to support our invasion of Iraq,
so we're mad at them now. We're also mad at the French
and the Germans because they didn't help us invade
Iraq either.

Q: So the French and Germans are evil, too?

A: Not exactly evil, but just bad enough that we had
to rename French fries and French toast to Freedom
Fries and Freedom Toast. (!!!)