Frodo: No, none that I can see. It's the same old plain ring.

Gandalf: [turns away from Frodo muttering] but I could have sworn...

Ring: Told you!

(Merithehobbit)

Frodo: No! Wait, something's written here. It looks like some form of Elvish,
Yiddish, Finnish... no maybe Hieroglyphics...that thing looks like a bird...
whatever it is it must have been a pain in the rear end to etch on here...talk
about your specialty shop class!! I can't read it.

http://www.stupidring.com/parody/index.htm

If I had all the money I'd spent on drink, I'd spend it on drink.
-- Sir Henry Rawlinson