Well a Scotsman tried and true left a bar on evening fair
And one could tell by how he walked that he drunk more than his share
He stumbled round until he could no longer keep his feet
Then he stumbled off into the grass to sleep beside a stream

Ring ding diddle diddle aye de oh
Ring di diddly aye oh
He stumbled off into the grass to sleep beside a stream

About that time two young and lovely ladies happened by
And one says to the other with a twinkle in her eye
See yon sleeping Scotsman, so strong and handsome built
I wonder if it's true what they don't wear beneath the kilt

Ring ding diddle diddle aye de oh
Ring di diddly aye oh
I wonder if it's true what they don't wear beneath the kilt

They snuck up on that sleeping Scotsman quiet as could be
Lifted up his kilt a little bit so they could see
And there for them to behold, beneath his Scottish skirt
Was nothing more than God had graced him with upon his birth

Ring ding diddle diddle aye de oh
Ring di diddly aye oh
Was nothing more than God had graced him with upon his birth

They marveled for a moment, then one said we must be gone
Let's leave a present for our friend, before we move along
As a gift they left a blue silk ribbon, tied into a bow
Around the bonnie sword, the Scotsman's kilt beneath did show

Ring ding diddle diddle aye de oh
Ring di diddly aye oh
Around the bonnie sword, the Scotsman's kilt beneath did show

Now the Scotsman a little later, he awoke to nature's call
And as he lifted up his kilt he gawked at what he saw
And in a strangled voice he says I can't believe me eyes.
Lad, I don't know where you've been, but I see you won first prize.

Ring ding diddle diddle aye de oh
Ring di diddly aye oh
Lad, I don't know where you've been, but I see you won first prize!