N.B.

This is a free translation from the satirical work made by one of russian
stand-up comics. Even though it describes the Iraq war, an event that has
taken many lives and is supposed to be sad, I think we can still all laugh at
the propaganda and shortsightedness of the information that the media has been
feeding us ever since the start of the conflict. Anyway, here goes.

E-Mail #1

Hello dear! Today we have cause for celebration at our base: we\'ll be flown
to Iraq! It\'s a long ways off from here. The guys say it\'s even further than
Mexico. Our commanders told us the war will be pretty tough, because it\'s so
hot there.

The sergeant tells us Iraq is at the southern tip of Africa. But our colonel,
who is a former high-school teacher of geography, said that the sarge is a
dumbass and that Iraq isn\'t in Africa, it\'s in the north of India.

In the morning the President sent us a message on the pager. He explained that
the Iraqi leader doesn\'t want to share his oil with us, and that means he\'s
against democracy. He said that now the main goal of all Americans is to bring
democracy to Iraq, because we are the most democratic country in the world. The
colonel said that Mr. President is a very brave man, because he decided to
attack a country just 20 times less in size.

In short, we\'re sure of swift victory, because we have the blessings of the
President and the most modern weapons: anti-infantry Pampers, explosives with
lemon taste and sugarfree grenades. There\'s just one thing that we don\'t
understand yet, is how we should call the place: Iraq or Iran?

Oh, and one more joyous thing. From now on you\'ll see me pretty often on the
TV. They\'ll be showing all our battles live, between the soap operas and the
commercials. I promise I\'ll be waving to you every time!

Yes, and don\'t worry, I didn\'t forget to take the sun cream.

"propaganda and shortsightedness of the information that the media"
..and you fix this by quoting ..a .. STAND_UP_COMIC.
Good job you dumb fuck.

- blackstar -