Taoism: Shit happens
Confucianism: Confucius say, "Shit happens"
Zen buddhism: Shit is, and is not.
Islam: If shit happens, it is the will of Allah
Catholicism: If shit happens, you deserve it
Rastafarianism: Let's smoke this shit
BatMUDism: If shit happens, we'll whine until we have shit falling out of our
ears.