25 specialties of computers that are used in Hollywood


1. Text editors do not have cursors.

2. Main heroes always type very fast, and never use the spacebar.

3. They also never make typing errors.

4. On any screen all the letters are always of several centimeters size.

5. Supercomputers, that NASA, CIA or other government structures use always
have very intuitive GUI. If the GUI isn't present, a very powerful
text-command UI is used, that can understand colloqual English. (This type of
UI allows you to access any information, you just have to type something like
"Give me access to secret files" on any keyboard that is around.

6. To infect computer with a deadly virus, it's enough to type "Load virus".

7. All computers are connected to the global net. You can read the info from
the maniac's main computer also in case his computer is switched off.

8. Powerful computers make beeping sounds at every keypress or at screen
redraw. Some computers slow down screen output in a way that you can read the
text as it appears, and the most advanced computers are even emulating the
sound of a needle-printer in the process.

9. All control panels work with kilo-volts power and have built-in explosion
devices. If computer fails, you can figure that out by seeing a bight flash,
lots of smoke and an explosion that will throw you away from your computer.

10. After you typed in some text document you can easily switch off the
computer without saving the data first.

11. Any hacker is able to break the most super-puper protection by
bruteforcing the password, normally 2nd try already lets him in.

12. You can bypass the message "Access Denied" by typing in "Override".

13. Any computer takes not more than 2 seconds to start up.

14. Extremely complex calculations and loading of hude data volumes takes not
more than 3 seconds.

15. Modems in the movies normally transmit data with the speed of at least 2
Gigabytes per second.

16. If the main computer of a nuclear power plant or of a missile base is
overheated, all the control panels must explode, just before the explosion of
the whole building.

17. If you're viewing a file, and someone deletes it in the process, file
disappears from your screen.

18. If you have encrypted files on your floppy, it's enough to insert it into
a floppy drive and computer will immediately ask the password.

19. Computers can exchange information with each other, independent of who
made the computers and in which galaxy (movie "independence day"). Every
system has absolutely identical standard interface. Thus, with the help of a
notepad, you can pick a PIN-code for a credit card ("Terminator-2").

20. Any floppy can be read by any computer with a floppy drive. Any programs
work on any platform.

21. The more advanced the computer is, the more buttons it has. Thus, to work
on this computer you need to have a very professional operatos, since there
aren't any labels on the buttons, except the button which says
"Self-destruction".

22. Majority of the computers, even the smallest ones, are able to work in the
modus of projecting real-time 3d interactive animation of huge sizes, with a
foto-realistic color-depth.

23. All the laptops can always work in the mode of a full-screen video-phone
real-time and have a perfomance ration comparable to Cray's.

24. When a hero is watching the screen, the picture is so brights, that his
face projection is always displayed.

25. Searching the internet will always give you precisely what you are looking
for, depite of the keywords you type in. For instance, in the movies "Mission
Impossible" Tom Cruise tried to find something using keywords "file" and
"computer", and received only 3 links are a response.

^o^