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Library: Of Donkeys and Elks


Author: darol
Date:Apr 6 2009

It's over three hours after midnight and I've been haunted by 
several zoological questions that just require answers, but also 
because I'm having trouble sleeping as I'm suffering from flu and 
sore throat (well who wouldn't suffer, this isn't very enjoyable 
you know!). Today we will put our focus on both donkeys and elks. 

It all started when I was wondering whether I'd have a sore 
throat if I was a donkey from Guatemala which eventually led
me into pondering what a society of donkeys would be like, if
such existed - and if such place exists, I wouldn't really 
know. Let's make a hypothesis that the donkey society is its
own crazy democracy in the streets of Guatemala, or Donkeymala
as I call it. The population of Donkeymala is less than the
equivalent population in the human Guatemala. Donkeymala does
not have a president, but instead is ruled by the minister
of ASSets. Many residents of Donkeymala work long days in 
logistics and the pay is not always that good. Some residents
however have different tasks and the society has its own
celebrities as well. 

One of the best known celebrities is Miss Donkey Hot, whose 
grandfather used to belong to Miguel de Cervantes, before the
poor ancestor ate the writer's last carrot and was sent from
Spain to the New World as punishment. If it wasn't easy for
her ancestor, it sure isn't easy for everyone else in the
current days either. The rate of corruption is very high and 
while the country has its good people, like miss Donkey Hot, it 
also has its own bad seeds.

One of these villains is a donkey who is the leader of the
notorious criminal family. He is an Italian-American donkey
who controls the sugar beet cartel in Donkeymala and also 
smuggles it abroad as well. Before he emigrated to Donkeymala,
he used to live in Florida Keys for a long time, but was
forced to leave when there was a high risk of being captured.
He is known as Don Keys and he has been residing somewhere in 
Donkeymala and has not been captured since. 

While it is significant to realize that the society of donkeys
may be independent of human influence, we must also consider
the huge impact of fauna when discussing the milestones
and achievements of our human-centered society. Thus it is
becoming very obvious that we must talk about elks.

A wise man once said: 'This blueberry cake is very tasty'. 
While you might be thinking that I must have misquoted, it is
important to understand that the concept in this case is not
the vital part. Even the wisest of all men will sometimes take
the day off and lie down to rest, perhaps enjoy a glass of
wine and perhaps enjoy a piece of blueberry cake. So in this
case, dear reader, you probably realize that it is not the 
importance of the sentence, rather than the importance of 
the person saying it and that is what we should concentrate
on. Once you understand this tiny, although significant, 
difference, comprehension of my other advanced ideas should
be a piece of cake to you - metaphorically speaking - or 
actually also quite literally and blueberry-flavoured in 
this particular case.

In the aforementioned example, the sentence carried no 
significance, but this is not always the case. It is entirely
possible that the sentence includes a significant truth, 
although the spoken words do not necessarily have the 
bombastivity to be recorded in the history books to be
quoted by generations to come. This is perhaps best 
explained with an example. Everybody knows Albert Einstein,
a theoretical physicist, who is best known for his
theory of relativity and the equasion that expresses the
equivalence of mass and energy. He is undoubtedly a great
man and his contributions to this world remain 
undisputable. Now let's think about elks. Imagine young 
Albert Einstein taking a road trip with his friends, when
the sun is already setting down and it is dark outside.
Suddenly an elk runs across the road, but young Albert
uses his Spiderman reflexes and shouts 'Watch out! An elk!'.
Now his friend quickly pulls the hand brake and just in
time they avoid a deadly collision. Had he died in the
accident at young age, the world would have never heard 
of the many breakthroughs that Albert Einstein later
pointed out. 

Therefore, we can make a plausible implication that 
even a quotation may prove to be a turning point in one's
life and be extremely significant, even if it would lack
certain catchiness and would therefore be left out
from the chronicles of history. As a conclusion, I thus
state the following: 'Even a dumb person can
quote the great minds, but only a wise man may say
the dumbest things and get away with it.'

And don't you quote me on that, or you will just prove 
that you learned none of the things that I was trying 
to explain to you in the last five chapters.