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Library: The giant


Author: dagel
Date:Apr 4 2004

A tribe of goblinoids lived in a cave deep underground. Ogres, orcs, goblins,
kobolds, bugbears and even a few trolls, all together. This is a story of one
member of this tribe.

This tribe, it was very highly respected by other nearby tribes and even
humans had heard of it. It was time of annual RAID. Leaders had gathered to
their one and only house (which was stolen from a town on the surface, since
goblinoids suck at building things.)

Kobold leader Trach said "Me know that he is trouble, but we can't leave him
out of this." Ogre leader Trolog "mrr! Me think, that we shoulds just eat him.
Big. Good meat!" Goblin leader Tretaght spoke "But it good to have giant in a
raid." Bugbears and trolls seemed to be missing. Trach pondered for a while
and came to conclusion "Mebbe if we wake him up we coldst talk to him." Trolog
said "Why did he even came here! Passed out in the middle of me market!"
Leaders went out, to the market where a giant was sleeping.

Bugbears and trolls were there to keep an eye on the giant. Leaders hailed
each other and started talking. (except troll leader Kurggle, who seemed to be
concentrating on drinking rest of giants' ale keg.) "We think, we sholdst wake
him up and ask him to join our raid." Trach said. Trolog said "Has he be
suspicious, me think we sholdst eat him." Bugbear leader Arrttaag said "No
suspicous, just sleeping, lets wake him."

They woke the giant up. The giant was a bit out of his mind. He tried to stood
up, but hit his head to the ceiling, (the tunnels were only 15 feet high.) He
decited to sit down. Bugbear leader Arrttaag spoke "what are yoo doing here,
messing up our RAID plannings." Trach said "We think, yoo sholds join our
tribe." The giant looked at Trach.  The giant spoke with thundering voice "My
name is Nicholai, and I was visiting with mommy and daddy the dwarves." The
giant thought a bit and continued "Dwarves gave me that keg" he looked around
and noticed that Kurggle had finished  drinking it. "so I drank it, while
mommy and daddy were shopping and somehow I ended up here, with no memory of
past events." Krach interrupted his story "Yoo will come with us to the RAID,
we're gonna burn down elven village!!!" Nicholai said "hmm, Ok, might as well,
since I don't know where the heck am I."

Couple days passed while preparing the RAID. Having the RAID seemed now really
necessery, since giants eat so much and goblinoids were running out of food.
Finally the plans were ready and army of ogres, orcs, goblins, kobolds
bugbears and even a few trolls started their journey to the elven village with
horrible battlecry which only army of goblinoids can produce.

Nicholai was leading the army. Orcs were right behind Nicholai, and all of
them still screamed the battlecry, even if it had been three hours since the
journey started. Nicholai wondered how long orcs can shout. Rest of the
goblinoid seemed to calm down or so he thought.

They traveled for half a day and met some elves.  Nicholai looked at elves and
shouted "Mommy! Daddy!" Female elf said "Oh Nicholai we were so worried!" Male
elf said "Who are these, friends of yours?" Nicholai said "No, these creatures
are going to burn down our village!" Male elf said "Oh... well no need for
that, let's kill these and go home."

The fierce battlecry started again, and about three thousand goblinoids
charged toward the elves. Goblinoids were certain of their victory!

Being great elven heroes fight clearly wasn't very long. All goblinoids were
dead in about five minutes.

The RAID this year was unsuccesful, but Nicholai found his mommy and daddy.
They went home and lived happily since then, they never visited dwarves again
and Nicholai didn't turn out  to be an alcoholic.