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Library: Destinata Illuminata


Author: merja
Date:Jan 5 2007

Destinata Illuminata, A Study of Light upon my Open Window
(Rilke and Merja)
How shall I hold on to my soul, so that
it does not touch yours? How shall I lift
it gently up over you on to other things?
I would so very much like to tuck it away
among long lost objects in the dark,
in some quiet, unknown place, somewhere
which remains motionless when your depths resound.
And yet everything which touches us, you and me,
bids me to return to you...
That is my open window. I
just awoke so gently.
I thought, I'm floating.
How far does my life reach,
and where does the night begin?
I could think that everything
around me is you,
like the transparent depth of a crystal,
solitary your luminosity, I alone
darkened and mute.

I think I could bring the stars
inside of me, so large
does my heart seem, so very much
does it wrestle to let go of you,
whom I have perhaps begun
to love, perhaps to hold.
So strange, so uncharted
does my destiny appear.
Who am I who lies here
under this eternal sky,
with the salted scent of the sea
moving back and forth, like a
lover, over me.
at once calling out and anxious,
that someone might hear my call, but
you are destined to vanish before my eyes,
but another solitary shadow.