You start a play, with following players: Jester.
%Jester strides onto the stage.
%Without a word Jester pulls out three colorful juggling pins.
%Jester lazily tosses first one, then all three, in a cascade.
%A pin spins around in Jester's hand while the others are in the air.
%Jester pauses mid toss and throws a flair!
%Jester's eyes scan the crowd as you watch the three pins hang in the air for
a second.
%Jester's hand's move quickly and snatch all three pins from the air in a
clawing motion.
%Jester catches the pins and stops with a flourish.
%Jester sets the pins off to the side and pulls out seven brightly colored
silicone juggling balls.
%Jester says 'And now it begins!'
%From a complete standstill Jester begins throwing balls in a cascade from
hand to hand.
%You can barely see the blur of Jester's hands.
%Jester says with confidence, "This is easy!"
%After a few seconds the pattern begins to break up, Jester's hands unable to
keep up!
%And then it is over as the balls crash down all around Jester.
%Jester looks sad for a moment.
%Jester kicks a yellow juggling ball HARD into the audience.
%Jester mutters, "I never much liked juggling anyway."
%Jester tromps off the stage.
%Jester whispers '(a voice from off stage) hmm, I don't want to lose the
crowd.'
%Jester whispers '(off stage) perhaps a recitation will mollify them.'
%Jester strides back onto the stage.
%Jester shouts 'Friends, Wizards, Batmudders, lend me your ears'
%Jester whispers 'damn, no no not that one...'
%Jester makes a gurgling sound as he clears his throat.
%Jester pauses for a second to compose himself.
%Jester begins speaking in a rhythmic fashion.
%Jester says 'You will I hope forgive my lack of meter'
%Jester says 'For as I shape these words for you to hear'
%Jester says 'You must believe that bat mud terms are not'
%Jester says 'Quite what the Bard foresaw when he did craft'
%Jester says 'the words I shall recount for you today.'
%Jester says 'Without further ado I humbly present...'
%Jester pauses for dramatic effect.
%the pause seems to go on and on as if Jester is counting to himself or
something.  The effect really is quite dramatic.
%Jester shouts 'The Seven Ages of BatMud'
%Jester whispers 'with apologies to the original Bard'
%Jester whispers 'and of course he of the stringy shadows, the original bard
of Batmud, without whom I would not be the bard I am today (or any bard for
that matter).'
%Jester begins declaiming in a deep voice.
%Jester says 'All the mud's a stage,'
%Jester says 'And all the kobolds and barsoomians merely players.'
%Jester says 'They have their exits and their entrances,'
%Jester says 'And each mudder, in his time plays many parts,'
%Jester says 'His act being seven ages.'
%Jester breathes deeply and continues.
%Jester says 'At first the newbie,'
%Jester says 'Mewling and puking in the newbie channel.'
%Jester says 'Then, the whining lowbie with tzarakk steed and'
%Jester says 'Mournful cries for lost unicorn saddlebags, bleating like a
lamb'
%Jester says 'On the wanted channel.  And then the freshly minted tarma'
%Jester says 'Sighing in exultation at the sudden beckoning of the exp
groups.'
%Jester says 'Then the barbarian growling, "gimme corpses lemme burn"'
%Jester says 'Full of toploftiness and bearded like A man with long black
beard is lying naked on the bed,'
%Jester says 'Jealous for repu, crying and luring in quarrel,'
%Jester says 'Seeking the bubble reputation, even in the cannon's mouth.'
%Jester pauses for a moment.
%Jester says 'And then the merchant in fair round belly with coffers mithril
lined,'
%Jester says 'With prices severe and beard of formal cut,'
%Jester says 'Resolute in repairs, and wise in the his kbh, and so he plays
his part.'
%Jester says 'The sixth age shifts into the lean and robed magi, with prancy
high-heeled glass shoes and a reagent pouch at his side'
%Jester says 'His youthful leggins of putrid flesh (undead) (+explore!), well
saved, a world too wide'
%Jester says 'For any but navigator transport.  His big manly voice,'
%Jester says 'Turning again toward childish treble,'
%Jester says 'Pipes and whistles in his sound.  Last scene of all,'
%Jester says 'That ends this strange eventful history,'
%Jester says 'Second childishness and the oblivion of immorting'
%Jester says 'Sans eyes, sans teeth, sans taste, sans everything.'
%Jester bows with a flourish of his cloak.
%Jester looks up in sudden realization.
%Jester whispers 'Perhaps here there is something more...'
%Jester's voice picks up the pace chanting faster and faster.
%Jester says 'For those of you who know this tale'
%Jester says 'You see that here should be its end'
%Jester says 'And yet in our fair world of bat'
%Jester says 'There lies a hidden world below'
%Jester says 'An unseen world where Wizards code'
%Jester says 'And giant bouncing bunnies breed'
%Jester says 'From forges made by GGR'
%Jester says 'I've seen the magic carrots fall'
%Jester says 'And clones they march across the land'
%Jester says 'Taunting with maniac glee'
%Jester says 'Elite the few who know for sure'
%Jester says 'What lies in wait for those who take'
%Jester says 'The final stage to wizardhood.'
%Jester bows with a flourish of his cape.
%His eyes close as Jester waits for something.
%Jester walks off the stage with all the dignity someone in a Jester's outfit
(that is way too tight!) can muster.
You stop the play.