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Ens's Blog

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Posted: 08 Jan 2024 14:41 [ permalink ]
[14:37]:Ens <chat>: i am actually an immortal irl btw
[14:39]:Doomface [chat]: so is doomface

 ... with great portent.
Posted: 12 Dec 2022 20:52 [ permalink ]
Pisano <wiz>: When the nuns hear the dong, they must gather.
Posted: 03 Apr 2022 07:11 [ permalink ]
Demonic spirit of Undyingrage (ghost): ress pls
Gunk (ghost): guess youre just rage now

Posted: 18 Sep 2021 07:39 [ permalink ]
Senson tells you 'any idea why this syntax isn't working?'
King shouts 'Senson died like a DOG!'
Posted: 07 May 2021 19:44 [ permalink ]
Ens <bat>: how many people are watching Gore's stream with a primary objective
           to see what kind of abuseholes or minmaxing they can achieve?
Morkzar [bat]: o/
Elwynes (bat): o/
Juggelo <bat>: o/
Ankas [bat]: :D
Posted: 17 Apr 2021 05:15 [ permalink ]
Darol Dawnlight, the emissary of decadence
Darol asks 'so this is a new room?'
You nod solemnly.
You ask 'did you get splore?'
Darol rolls his eyes.
You say 'i will hit all rooms.'
Posted: 09 Apr 2021 22:17 [ permalink ]
The perfect response:

You tell Darol 'I have a question... If I may be so bold. Since we know that
archwizards are always right:'
You tell Darol 'Would you answer no to the question of whether you would
answer no to this question?'

Darol tells you 'I'll quote one finnish politician from the old days and
 say: I'm not for it or against it, and as a matter of fact in fact it's
 actually opposite of that'

Posted: 08 Apr 2021 04:49 [ permalink ]
Today I had the same conversation (more or less) about three hundred or so
times with an NPC before finally being able to have the same conversation also
... but with a torch.
Posted: 28 Dec 2020 08:28 [ permalink ]
Zidane [chat]: after a long day of mudding, I can't wait to get home and beat
               the shit out of my kids.

Posted: 20 Mar 2019 16:43 [ permalink ]
[16:41]:Ens <code>: i'm trying to code a well stocked bar and its giving me
some issues
[16:41]:Gore <code>: it's making you thirsty?
[16:41]:Juggelo <code>: keep on consumin' the goods like a proper irishman?
[16:42]:Ens <code>: actually both of these comments are unfortunately true
Posted: 08 Nov 2015 10:24 [ permalink ]
Grimreefer [newbie]: it is amazing
Posted: 08 Nov 2015 10:24 [ permalink ]
Grimreefer [newbie]: im smoking a joint a wizard gave me
Posted: 20 Jul 2013 01:53 [ permalink ]
> blog darol 57418
Amd {bat}: I like my women like my whiskey. 12year old and mixed up with coke.
Posted: 24 Jun 2013 02:04 [ permalink ]
> cast aura detection at darol
Aura detection: #
You utter the magic words 'fooohh haaahhh booooloooooh'
You cast the spell successfully.
You detect Wrath of darolism.

Posted: 11 May 2013 16:16 [ permalink ]
To the Monthy Python galaxy song tune:
Tulkas [chat]: just remember that your standing on a mud thats evolving
Tulkas [chat]: and revolving at 900 logins a day
Tulkas [chat]: thats changing at 9000 keystrokes a second, so its reckoned ,
on a mudlib that is not so gay
Tulkas [chat]: the wizzes and you and me , and all the players you cannot see
are chatting and batting frivolously
Tulkas [chat]: in a backward ip address in parts most foreign of a country
where we'd all like to be!

Posted: 05 Apr 2013 00:14 [ permalink ]
Blayke arrives from west.
Blayke 'hmmmm's for a moment at you.
Blayke hugs you.
Blayke leaves west.
Blayke arrives from west.
Blayke starts concentrating on a new offensive spell.
Blayke traces transparent watery runes on the ground with her Staff of Druids
'#
!#'
Blayke face turns from delight into horror as she watches the ground beneath
her
turn into mud.
Blayke helplessly stumbles into the pit.
********************** Round 1 **********************
You miss Blayke.
You score a CRITICAL hit!
Grinning satanically you BARBARICALLY PIERCE Blayke making the head explode
violently.
Blayke lapses into unconsciousness from severe loss of blood.
Blayke dies in a massive pool of blood.
Blayke is DEAD, R.I.P.
Blayke's corpse is collected by Death, clad in black.
Ghost of Blayke {ghost}: ouchie!

Posted: 09 Nov 2012 02:05 [ permalink ]
Darol <wiz>: there are quests that require you to assassinate the king but if
             you didn't eat blueberries with the sailors at the docks, you
             might be considered a failure. That's sometimes kinda annoying

Posted: 22 May 2012 03:41 [ permalink ]
Presence (bat): Don't tell me about drawbridge. I was kicking over drawbridge
when you great great grandpappy still had training wheels on his sable axe.
Posted: 18 May 2012 20:07 [ permalink ]
Unexpected wizsummon consequences.

Antarax the transparent Shadow ponders eternity appears in a blink of light.
There is a fierce combat going on here, beware!
Antarax lapses into unconsciousness from severe loss of blood.
Antarax escapes death and recovers consciousness!
Antarax lapses into unconsciousness from severe loss of blood.
Antarax's skull splits wide open, revealing some mushy-green substance.
Antarax is DEAD, R.I.P.
Antarax's corpse is collected by Death, clad in black.
Gatekeeper gains strenght from slaying Antarax and looks much better.
Posted: 03 Dec 2011 22:32 [ permalink ]
Dralith tells you 'Don't leave stargates lying around'
Posted: 27 Nov 2011 19:07 [ permalink ]
[chat]: Garok ponders if people who believe in reincarnation should have 'BRB'
 on their headstones rather than 'RIP'
Posted: 26 Feb 2011 17:28 [ permalink ]
Dabie [wanted]: what is in "a black gate to HELL" and how do i enter it? :>
Tatza (wanted): my guess is that you don't want to enter it
Proprius [wanted]: I know a faster route to hell
Corto (wanted): you see a black gate to HELL and your first question is how to
ENTER it? :O
Posted: 24 Feb 2011 22:01 [ permalink ]
Yggdrasil [newbie]: welcome to the religion of calculating batmud melee
damage.
                    we are a splintered church with many offshoots and
                    branches, and we constantly argue with one another... but
                    we all worship DAMAGE.

Posted: 08 Feb 2011 04:01 [ permalink ]
[04:00]:Talithra [newbie]: meesa powerfully perforating
Posted: 04 Oct 2010 16:25 [ permalink ]
Morhag [wanted]: anyone at speed of liftmages?
Morhag [wanted]: of lol of = or
Lammas {wanted}: and if?
Morhag [wanted]: yes makes sense if it goes like anyone at speed if liftmages

Posted: 20 Sep 2010 01:10 [ permalink ]
Freld tells you 'broke when i went inside you and you came inside
 yourself'

Posted: 03 Sep 2010 00:11 [ permalink ]
You toe-kick Durand causing major annoyance.
Durand loses connection to reality, becoming truly STUNNED.
Posted: 05 Apr 2010 17:12 [ permalink ]
Streacer [bat]: "give head to liezeb" "Liezeb says: OH!"  Really, BatMUD?
Trachyos [bat]: haha
Trachyos [bat]: the game at its finest
Posted: 24 Mar 2010 23:14 [ permalink ]
Felder (legion+): well, it all started innocently, but i suppose everything in
bat is few sentences away from 'gloryhole' :)
Posted: 21 Feb 2010 04:37 [ permalink ]
Issen tells you 'I salute you, mr ens, for being able to play tarma for more
than a week without wanting to /wrists :D'
Posted: 18 Feb 2010 22:28 [ permalink ]
Ggr [bat]: "We will fight on the beaches of Lucentium, the marshes of
Furnachia, we will fight in the areas, we will fight on the streets of
Arelium, we will never surrender!"
Posted: 03 Feb 2010 01:19 [ permalink ]
Flashfire says 'Just like Freld...you bring darkness. :).'
Posted: 19 Jan 2010 02:14 [ permalink ]
Sprite {sales}: it does NOT say Santa, but I can't wear it.
Badhan [sales]: well ill withdraw my bid if i cant use it
Sprite {sales}: pendant withdraw. apparently worthless.
Sprite {sales}: (laugh) if is "owned" by a player who was last on over 7 years
ago.  No Fair
Arctangent [sales]: maybe a wiz will trade you that one for a good one
Arctangent Phaseangle is a level 46 mortal of the Minotaur race.
He was created Sat Jul 16 04:29:21 2005 and he is 28d, 11h, 49min and 5s old.

... oh how naive these young ones are.
Posted: 16 Jan 2010 02:59 [ permalink ]
[00:50]:Ssmud [party]: blayke move that pillar
[00:51]:Blayke (party): done.
[00:51]:Blayke (party): i moved that shit TO THE LEFT
[00:51]:Ssmud [party]: enter statue
[00:51]:Blayke (party): done
[00:51]:Blayke (party): i am one with stone
[00:51]:Ssmud [party]: hahaha
[00:51]:Ssmud [party]: enter pillar

Posted: 08 Jan 2010 15:08 [ permalink ]
Magiscus [legion+]: what syntax is used to communicate with people of
mirkhold? talk/say/ask/something else what?
Jarlaxle (legion+): kill?
Kohothegreat {legion+}: dig grave
Posted: 02 Jan 2010 01:02 [ permalink ]
Spid (bat): there is no logic, only tunepole
Posted: 19 Nov 2009 20:35 [ permalink ]
Grumnak [client]: everytime I give command there is a none to some lag
Posted: 16 Nov 2009 08:51 [ permalink ]
Robinhood [nightlife+]: what kinda rate can archer solo?
Xyloid (nightlife+): at least 3k/min
Conquer (nightlife+): hopefully greater than 2k
Freld (nightlife+): depends on how long you want to solo :)
Conquer (nightlife+): ok ok, id say closer to 10k
Conquer (nightlife+): depends on a variety of things, do you have a ship, do
                      you rock at soloing to start, do you have any toys, how
                      well do you adjust to variety of shit
Conquer (nightlife+): if you are willing to pee in a bottle instead of leaving
                      computer to pee, you should technically solo a higher
                      rate
Robinhood [nightlife+]: starting to understand!
Hemicuda [nightlife+]: hmm what if you have girlfriend?
Calada [nightlife+]: yes, you can also pee on her

Posted: 30 Sep 2009 16:14 [ permalink ]
Lnewlfe [newbie]: heres a question. I wandered to the village questor, typed
                  quest 2, as im level 2, got the quest that said Congratz,
you
                  found the questor which is quest, you finished. But no one
                  actually GAVE me the quest, and i dont see anywhere that i
                  HAD a quest, nor that i actually DID complete it
Sigh the Helper (newbie): That's how quests work in batmud :)
Posted: 26 Sep 2009 01:56 [ permalink ]
Alakhai (party): in the name of kamikaze+, here i go
Ghost of Alakhai (report): nyt muuten HURTS!
Ghost of Alakhai (report): i am no longer stunned
Ghost of Alakhai (report): Invis off
Ghost of Alakhai (party): yeah it's agro
Posted: 06 Sep 2009 07:12 [ permalink ]
Blayke commands 'TAKE ME DOWN.'
You mumble 'oh yea.'
You are done with the chant.
You trace fiery red runes on your gem '& ^'
Your druidstaff is surrounded by a sudden cloudburst, and you glory in sheer
 power as the staff floods your spell with pure energy.
A beam of red firelight springs from the gem.
The gem shudders ...but does not break.
You watch with selfpride as your gem fire hits Blayke.
Blayke lapses into unconsciousness from severe loss of blood.
Posted: 06 Sep 2009 05:42 [ permalink ]
Blayke (party): never lure when 2 trolls in same room
Posted: 02 Sep 2009 23:36 [ permalink ]
Xardax [wanted]: party for the best tank under 600 hp you can find!
Posted: 28 Aug 2009 14:19 [ permalink ]
Durand awards Susette -1 points for completing 'Good Ideas' task.

Posted: 05 Aug 2009 23:00 [ permalink ]
| 1102446: Lear Rotth, the undead lord superior, infuriated beyond comprehens
|
Posted: 10 Apr 2009 01:29 [ permalink ]
You tell Kapu 'did my clone die with honour?'
Kapu tells you 'he fought valiantly'
Kapu tells you 'was close to finishing his 2nd cure serious wounds when i put
him to sleep'
Posted: 09 Apr 2009 22:34 [ permalink ]
|  650379: Inra the valheru god (unholy)                                     
|
Posted: 05 Apr 2009 21:44 [ permalink ]
| 1082148: a gorgeous looking woman clad in shadows                          
|
Posted: 29 Mar 2009 02:14 [ permalink ]
| 535153: Grimoor, Lord of Ultimate Chaos

Ssmud [party]: 1 more
Blayke {party}: well ok
Blayke {party}: sniffle
Ssmud [party]: i wont kill it
Ens [party]: dcrit run
Ssmud leaves gangway.
Blayke HANDLES gangway.
Ssmud [party]: lol
Ssmud [party]: dcrit wont kill it
Ssmud [report]: Dcrit level 2
Ssmud [report]: Grimoor (Screams 0% resist) (Magical)
hp: 552 (552) [-1] sp: 381 (1305) [] ep: 239 (205) cash: 251 [] exp: 185462
[+80190]
Ssmud [party]: LOL
Blayke {party}: nice
Ens [party]: haha
Ssmud [party]: well
Blayke {party}: fucking moron :D
Posted: 28 Mar 2009 03:01 [ permalink ]
1386832: Lord Foul sits upon his throne
Posted: 27 Mar 2009 22:26 [ permalink ]
2802: Wandering skeleton of Henry
Posted: 24 Mar 2009 02:43 [ permalink ]
| 1103866: Tom Bombadil is here feeding birds and bunnies.                   
|
Posted: 22 Mar 2009 17:34 [ permalink ]
Azura [wanted]: blaster under level 50 are more rare than sober wiz..
Posted: 20 Mar 2009 02:00 [ permalink ]
|  753221: Rechendak, the Elementalist, Lord of the Cloud and the Giants     
|
1 hour 21 minutes!
Posted: 12 Mar 2009 22:10 [ permalink ]
| 1027849: Jane, the Goddess                                                 
|
Posted: 11 Mar 2009 11:27 [ permalink ]
(11:19) Nomed tells you 'dont say death to all newbies on newbie channel'
Posted: 10 Mar 2009 11:24 [ permalink ]
Nazrix [tunes]: But you see, Str, people like xunisiih want mud to be
                SO-FUCKING-HARDCORE, ONLY CRACK NIGGA WITH 500000X TOLERANCE
TO
                PAIN WILL REMAIN.
Posted: 10 Mar 2009 04:17 [ permalink ]
Freld removes black horned helm labeled as HOMOKYPÄRÄ TUUTTUUT.
Freld wears a small monocle with a golden chain (glowing) <red glow>.
Freld peers quizzically at you.

Hp:565/565 Sp:1196/1196 Ep:232/232 >undo freld
You clence your fist, pressing the thorns of the finger guard into your hand.
Freld disappears in a sudden fluctuation of the fabric of space.


Posted: 07 Mar 2009 13:11 [ permalink ]
Malcom tells you 'you know, once you get to class 4 and have a tele chamber
 i am totally looting the alcohol from your ship :P'

You tell Malcom 'lol! how'd you know i have it stocked up?'
Malcom tells you 'your irish'
Posted: 05 Mar 2009 23:12 [ permalink ]
You tell Pelend (dead) 'you know what's better than one wand in a room?'
Ghost of Pelend tells you 'Hitler.'
Posted: 03 Mar 2009 23:26 [ permalink ]
Demonic rings. Useful for exploring.
You sneak past the orc captain.
Orc sergeant shouts 'Hey an invis guy!'
... And that's the end of that explore session.
Posted: 18 Mar 2008 09:27 [ permalink ]
Chorale tells you 'Ramon tells you 'Ens just offered a large sum for your
 head. We can bring you him if you pay a meager sum of 278400 gold coins.''
Posted: 20 Jan 2008 00:32 [ permalink ]
Kohothegreat flaps his arms and utters the magic words 'ghht mar nak grttzt'
As Kohothegreat casts the spell, he pulls out a bronze marble which bursts
into
a million prismatic starbursts.
Kohothegreat grins as his blast vacuum hits Alexandra.
Esachen echoes 'Cursed be desos, blayke, desos, blayke, desos, blayke, desos,
blayke, desos, blayke, desos, blayke, desos, blayke, desos, blayke, desos,
blayke, desos, blayke, desos, blayke, desos, blayke, desos, blayke, desos,
blayke, desos, blayke, desos, blayke, desos, blayke, desos, blayke, desos,
blayke, desos, blayke, desos, blayke, desos, blayke, desos, blayke, desos,
blayke, desos, blayke, desos, blayke, desos, blayke, desos and blayke.'
Alexandra starts levitating and vibrating violently...
Burglefloogah belches 'Die you balance whore, DIE!'
      ...and suddenly EXPLODES splattering her intestines all over you.
Posted: 06 Jun 2007 08:22 [ permalink ]
1207446: Tyranicus Karakurt the king of the lizard men
Posted: 06 Jun 2007 00:07 [ permalink ]
1172273: Rotahunt the Confessor
Posted: 05 Jun 2007 10:50 [ permalink ]
761283: Reanimated body hosting the ancient Witch-king
Posted: 05 Jun 2007 10:50 [ permalink ]
1105360: Arthas, the Paladin Master of the Highest Justice 
Posted: 12 May 2007 20:30 [ permalink ]
1236771: a gorgeous looking woman clad in shadows
Posted: 17 Mar 2007 15:50 [ permalink ]
You drink from the river of beer. It tastes like beer.
Although somewhat bitter, you still force it down.
You are so full of liquid you feel like you might burst.
Posted: 09 Mar 2007 00:06 [ permalink ]
Merja [chat]: You offer clerk a membership in your party. Clerk says, " I must
 have the shittiest job in town . "
Posted: 04 Sep 2006 04:56 [ permalink ]
 1359097: a massive iron statue has come to life                             |
Posted: 04 Sep 2006 04:17 [ permalink ]
a high priestess of Esachen, protect.., 1259468 exp (party of 9)
Posted: 03 Sep 2006 20:54 [ permalink ]
It's night and very dark, but you can still see.
You are standing on a thick branch in the tree.  Many tree branches spread
around you, covering you with a canopy of leaves.  You can no longer see the
ground below you.
Above you is a hot, still, cloudy night sky. The moon is not visible.
Obvious exits are: ne, sw and d.
a pile of zinc coins
two one platinum coins
Posted: 02 Sep 2006 22:38 [ permalink ]
[22:37]:Reagent [party]: maiden likes to sexchange
[22:37]:Reagent [party]: beats the hell outta mace
Posted: 02 Sep 2006 21:19 [ permalink ]
General Info:
    Ukkeli has proven he is a slow learner with the "don't use triggers" bit.
    He's been given a month to catch up on this matter. Thanks to Grizzt for
    being to drunk to send this message himself.

Posted: 31 Aug 2006 23:42 [ permalink ]
Rigger {bloodway+}: in this reinc i can choose what i am bored by, alchemy
 research, runic research, or tinkering.
Posted: 17 Jul 2006 17:38 [ permalink ]
la lights
There are no light sources here, but you can still see.
There are two lights, one blue and one red..
Posted: 13 Jul 2006 21:08 [ permalink ]
Ssmud [party]: ,---------------------------------------------------------------
-----------.
Ssmud [party]: | Time             Killed by                    |
Ssmud [party]: |---------------------------------------------------------------
-----------|
Ssmud [party]: | 13 Jul - 01:06   Ens Shazam the Zombie chants ominously <
beta squad >   |
Ssmud [party]: `---------------------------------------------------------------
-----------'

Posted: 26 May 2006 22:22 [ permalink ]
zonni statue shouts 'Looking back on where we first met, I cannot escape and I
cannot forget. Baby you're the one, you still turn me on. You can make me
whole again'
Posted: 20 May 2006 02:40 [ permalink ]
You are done with the chant.
You hop up and down while flapping your arms and chant 'xafe xyyqh
 xckgandhuzqarr'
You sense your surroundings distorting and then snap.
You arrive 40 meters from the ground.

......Falling down to the ground you take some damage.
hp: 542 (582) [-40] sp: 161 (1006) [-46] ep: 229 (229)
-40 from falling 40 meters? For a tarm, I rock
Posted: 18 May 2006 03:27 [ permalink ]
Malcom zaps you with A dull maple wand (2/100).
You are scarred.
Malcom [party]: not so funny now!
Posted: 08 May 2006 18:52 [ permalink ]
Mariah, the circus' beautiful riddler

ask riddle
You ask Mariah for a riddle.
It seems she is thinking of a new riddle to ask, wait a moment.
Mariah looks like she thought of a new riddle to ask.
ask riddle

You ask Mariah for a riddle.

The clue: 'This is a monster.'
The permuted answer: 'aMrih,a The iruCs'c lfBeautiu Reddirl'


You ask Mariah for a riddle.

The clue: 'This is an offensive skill.'
The permuted answer: 'Kick'.
Posted: 05 May 2006 17:00 [ permalink ]
Female Duz takes a steaming entrails of Female Duz.
Female Duz skips east.
 ^^^ yikes!
Posted: 02 May 2006 06:49 [ permalink ]
Rastline [party]: I thinkI got my my cat addicted to beef jerky
Posted: 26 Apr 2006 06:33 [ permalink ]
Kalbo grabs Spectre's arm and twists it dislocating its shoulder!
Posted: 26 Apr 2006 06:30 [ permalink ]
Kenny tells Ssmud, Killian and you 'I DONT SDMOKE POIT'
Posted: 26 Apr 2006 06:30 [ permalink ]
Darol (bat): i agree that it's sad if the only difficult part of the quest is
9 men thinking about how to get a jar of honey from the shelf...